That is likely to change. For many, myself included, the confusion strikes even before a bullet enters the arm. “Expecting social interaction is often the hardest part,” Brown says. “The dilemma that is likely to get worse may actually be the severity of the dilemma once it is here, but there is that uplifting time that could be very difficult for people. ”Welcome to construction time.
The good news is that we can alleviate these symptoms. The first step is to stay present. Easier said than done, but when you feel the thoughts of the future creeping in, Brown says, try to catch them and remind yourself not to worry about summer until, well, summer. “When we think about the future we feel anxious, and when we think about the past we tend to feel sad. So the goal, as much as possible, is to try to stay right here and now. “
Above all we have to make agreements to be nice to ourselves. Richard Heimberg, a professor of psychology at Temple University and former director of his Adult Anxiety Clinic, notes that this kindness will be needed especially as “rust” those who are anxious and careless. Even the things that felt second nature in the Before Times, like commuting to work or office work, could provoke some discomfort after a whole year of inactivity. “Our level of concern [all] There is a general feeling of being raised as a result of the health concerns and the concerns about rust, ”he says. It is important to ensure that any goals we have set for ourselves take this into account, and that we treat them as desires rather than dictates.
“If we expect ourselves to behave perfectly,” says Heimberg, “we are going to hit ourselves if we do not reach that level. “For some, recycling may be more of a slow move than a clean break through our shells, and that’s okay.” It’s about accepting that everyone else is Just as anxious about what we think of them and the other way around. And it’s about allowing ourselves to be just human. ”
With life ahead the line, the Covid-19 threat empowered many of us with unspeakable confidence – to others and to ourselves. Luckily the few social outings I’ve gotten in for a lock have come with an added level of sensitivity from friends and family. I did my best to give them the same. Perhaps most importantly, the circumstances led me to extend that policy of acceptance of judgment to myself as well. And I’m not ready to give up.
I don’t have to. That honor for ourselves and others about what we are comfortable with and what we really are request you do not have to disappear with the virus. Of course, all the practice of navigating conversations about the situations and actions with which we are okay, virus-aware, may leave us feeling better off.
“This pandemic has created a language for people to start explaining how their comfort levels may be different from their friends’, and I think it’s a terrible start. that is, ”says Brown. “When the context is different, and the virus is less of a reason you can’t engage socially, I think people still need to set those boundaries on their own. .. Not that they should say no to everything, but that you should say that for the things that would make you happy. “
In a perfect world, I would be Marie Kondo the hell out of my social life after the vaccination – doing the things that make me happy and saying no to the things that are not. I would burst the bubbles without losing my pandemic vision. Of course, it’s never that simple. I am still the same person. It is inevitable that expectation will enter. Sometimes I do things I don’t want to do, or look around and see if my decisions are the right ones. But hopefully, I’ll be a little kinder to myself along the way.