Here’s the thing about stardom pop: The world can’t move its view. Like a vortex, it sucks in the eyes. He is a disco ball, expressing humanity on his own. For women in particular, it’s a minefield. When you are famous, people feel that you have a right to look at you, then criticize what they see. Artists feature slut-shaped outdoor clothing, while others welcome headlines such as “Every Time Billie Eilish Ditched her Baggy Outfits for Tight Clothes.” (I won’t link to that piece.) It’s so common that Eilish herself made a short film to deal with it. “Some people hate what I wear; some praise it, ”she said in a voice. “Some use it to embarrass others; some people use it to embarrass me. But I feel like you’re watching – always – and nothing I do is going to go unnoticed. ”
It is a reiteration, therefore, that Eilish has the new Apple TV + documentary, Little Blurry of the World, devoting almost none of the 2 – hour, 20 – minute run time to talk about Eilish ‘s body or those who want to comment on it. Instead, doc RJ Cutler limits discussion about her physical form to talk about shin splints, sprained ankles, and other ailments brought on by her highly motivated live performances. Instead, the film takes an open, and almost vulnerable, look at the fate of his fame, Eilish is hereafter curling before our eyes.
Eilish talks, as most stars do, about how much she values her wills, which she says are not fans, but “part of me. ” But she also talks openly about depression, standing up for herself in relationships, and her history of self-harm, which came from the early teens ’belief that she“ deserved it. ” She shares the anxiety associated with asking if the internet likes her work, something her brother and producer Finneas say that frightens her to ‘attractive songwriting, because “her equation, the more popular something is, the more she hates it. . ”
When, in the documentary, she experiences a series of Tourette syndrome tics as she reviews marketing materials for her Grammy-winning album When we all fall asleep, where do we go?, her mother notes, could be the result of fatigue and excess weight. “I’ve done something crazy because of my Tourette,” adds Eilish. “I broke a glass once – in my mouth – because I have this one [tic] where I bite down on something. If I have something I’ll just go [chomps down], because my brain is like [snaps fingers] ‘Do it!’ ”For a situation that is so often misunderstood, and poorly represented, in the popular media, it feels like a gift to see someone talk about it so openly.
It’s hard not to see what Eilish’s life is, and what she’s willing to share, getting information from what stardom has done to so many before. In one scene, someone on her team asks if Eilish is comfortable sharing a video in which she says “drugs and cigarettes are killing yourself.” The possible PR nightmare is, perhaps, that she can one day eat a substance and be termed a hypocrite. Her mother complains that there is no reason why she should not be proven, and that Eilish could live as a lifelong teetotaler. Eilish agrees that “the woman has a point. ”But, Mum counts,“ you have a whole army of people trying to help you without deciding to ruin your life like people in your shoes did before. ”Eilish, out of Mum’s eye line, responds with Officewell deserved, just a “Welp!” camera grin-frown. Shortly afterwards, at Coachella, both Katy Perry and Justin Bieber show up to tell Eilish that the next decade of her life is going to be unbelievable, “wild. ”When Bieber says it, it ‘s like inspiration. When Perry does, it feels like a warning.